* Dressing Confrontation at The Pig

Ok, I know there's lots that I should be doing, but I just had to post this. It was a situation screaming for a blog post!! Hubby and I had 5 places we HAD to stop by this morning...pick up prescriptions, etc. So we got a fairly late start...about 10:30ish. The first three stops were uneventful but boy did things pick up at #4...Piggly Wiggly...aka The Pig. I stayed in the car and out he hopped to pick up 5 things: pre-ordered dressing & gravy, family size teabags, Sprite and one of those Alabama caramel cakes. That's all...no more, no less.

I was left in the car to watch the parking lot drama. Here's what I wrote down for your entertainment:

• Sitting in car watching men screech into their parking space, leap from their vehicle with list in hand, and run for the door. (Faces iced in panic...little lady at home tapping her foot waiting on some forgotten ingredient.)
• NO women in sight right now..only men. Parking correctly isn't done today...no time...
• Shopping carts are in disarray...no time to politely place them in the corral. Watching carefully....the men are spending about 5-8 minutes max for the visit.
• Women begin arriving...all obviously married to hunters or they wouldn't be caught dead at the Pig on Thanksgiving eve. Many have their hair pulled back or have resorted to wearing baseball caps to hide what's lurking underneath. They are all mad because somebody forgot the vanilla or the cream cheese...huffing and puffing...average visit 3 1/2 minutes.
• All cars are being driven WaaaaaY too fast in the parking lot...grandmother and little child almost mowed down by frantic man. He apologized...grandmama isn't happy.
• Hubby arrives back....after 20 minutes...uh, oh...that's not a good sign...nobody has stayed inside the Pig for more than 8 minutes. He says (and I quote)..."Make an entry into the checkbook...$78.00!" (If you are keeping tabs that pushes the Thanksgiving meal to way more than $225.) :( He sarcastically adds not to be giving away leftovers tomorrow...we have to survive on the leftovers until payday.
• When asked what took so long this is my Husband's report on scenario inside the Pig: He goes to the Deli and says, "I'd like to pick up my dressing order," he states. Girl behind the counter,"I'm sorry, but you picked it up yesterday." Hubby becomes agitated, "What are you talking about? It's Wednesday, isn't it? You told me to pick it up after 10:00 Wednesday." Girl: "I am sorry sir but this ticket says you picked it up yesterday." Hubby: (I will make this readable) "I don't care what the ticket says, I have NOT picked up the dressing, today or yesterday! I want my dressing!"
• Result of confrontation: We got the dressing...$54.00 worth. We are freezing one container for Christmas...unless you and all your family would like to come eat with us tomorrow...remember: 24 pounds of green beans and $54.00 worth of dressing will go a very long way. You are all welcome and pick up anyone else you may see along the way. If you like the Pig's dressing and my green beans, tomorrow will be your lucky day.
• BTW: one of my former students (young married type) just posted a request on FB for any good recipes for dressing....ah ha ha ha....last night or this morning....My advice to her was to go to the Pig immediately...maybe SHE picked up our dressing.