An Exceedingly Gracious Gift

This summer, in our women's Sunday School class, we have been studying Biblical Womanhood. My eyes have been opened to many things during this time, but the one thing that stands out like a shining star is the FACT that God has given us a great gift in REPENTANCE.

My idea of repentance has always been a typical Webster's definition: "to turn from sin and resolve to reform one's life. to feel sorry for (something done) : REGRET."

And while this definition is correct, it's not nearly that simple. Repenting can become a ritual, like saying "I'm sorry" just to avoid further conflict. Repentance can be mere words with no heartfelt reversal of actions or it can be temporary, a fleeting moment of conscience.

It's no fun to repent. It means you have to bare your soul. If it's to another human, it's humiliating. But if it's to God, it can be downright heart rending. In prayer, repenting used to be so painful that I dreaded "that part". It was especially hurtful when you kept confessing habitual sin. (Which, of course, means that you said "I am sorry", but didn't take the next step....actually reform.)

Saying all that brings me to the point here...repentance is a continual process in a Christian's life. God has done His part. He has "imputed my sin to my substitute (Jesus), and hast imputed His righteousness to my soul..", but in my day to day earthly Christian walk, I am still stained with sin. I am so sinful that sometimes (most times) I don't even repent for the right reason.

 BUT, God is faithful and every day He rewards me with His incomparable grace and allows me to approach His throne and REPENT. As I do so, I receive His forgiveness and His strength, through the Holy Spirit to persevere. What a gift to a Christian...to be able to recognize sin, call it what it is and ask for forgiveness. And the "cherry on the top" is that we are given renewed strength day after day.

" Grant me never to lose sight of
the exceeding sinfulness of sin,
the exceeding righteousness of salvation,
the exceeding glory of Christ,
the exceeding beauty of holiness,
the exceeding wonder of grace."

(The Valley of Vision, p. 136-137)



Grace and peace to you,

Elephants and Skeletons

I know you like funny stories and design tips. I can't deliver that today. I have been awake since 4 a.m. The more the sun rose, the worse I felt. I had high hopes for today, but I am sick...not just physically.

I have a feeling if we tiptoed into your home and quietly opened your front door we might see an elephant or two sitting in your living room. Mine? Oh, I have several on any given day taking up lots of space...especially in my heart.

What's that rattling noise in my closet?  Do you hear it? Do you have that noise, too? It's those pesky skeletons again. Somebody must be trying to see what all is in there again or maybe they are making room for another one. People love those...in SOMEBODY ELSE'S closet. Have you noticed? They love to feast on other's famine. We are all guilty of joining that feast at one time or another.

This summer the ladies in our church are embarking on a study of biblical womanhood.
I am trying to attend with a totally open heart...like I have never heard of this concept. That's hard to do...but I need this study. I need guidance in how to handle all these "elephant" situations. My heart is full and empty simultaneously.

Does that make any sense? How can you be overwhelmed with grief and joy at the same time?
I know I sound like a loon...but that's where I am.

If you are down in this dark hole with me, please, know you are not alone. If you hear somebody blowing her nose..it's me. I am right there..but better yet..we have a Friend there too and He's there with us for the long haul. With His help we can hold our heads up and climb out. My prayer is that you and I may come to truly realize that. Hold on..not to me..but to the One's hand that can steady and strengthen us.

God bless you,

A Look At Home

This week, two incidents have given me pause to examine some feelings. First, I have reconnected with some old friends from Grenada over the past few months and have enjoyed exchanging pictures of days gone by with them. Second, I received a decorating book that I ordered with the recommendation of another blogger. I knew I was wrong when I ordered the darn thing...too many pages were filled with things I could never have. I once had a pastor who said he threw away all the catalogs that came to his house. That they just set in motion a yearning for more and more things. How true.

As I mentally put the book aside, (still in my pajamas) I grabbed my camera and out the door I went.
I quietly absorbed the country stillness, the birds at the feeder, the gentleness of the breeze. I photographed "our land" from different angles.

This photo is the road "home". Every time I turn onto it, I feel a peace come over me. It's not grand...just a country road, but it signals that I can leave turmoil behind, if only for a while.

 

When I sit on my back porch, these pastures are my breathing space. Nothing fancy, just a few horses and some donkeys, a few rolling hills. But when I hear the hooves beat, and see them gallop toward their feeding area at dusk, it just can't be beat.

 

I enjoy sitting on my back porch when it rains and watching my rain chain flow.

 

 My birds that come to my feeders never disappoint me.

 

...and those that choose to nest with us every year are like loyal friends.

My friends are a lot like my favorite birds...there's the chickadee who always flits around, is friendly, kind,  shares with others and ALWAYS gives me birdseed as one of my Christmas presents! There are two cardinal friends. They are loyal, always present, and bring beauty and calm whenever they are around. Then there's my mockingbird. She is not afraid to tell me the unvarnished truth...she frequently states, "Stop the Madness!" and pulls me back when I overdo (..she also eats Mexican with me because my husband won't!) Now that's true friendship. My bluebird friend and I can be away from each other for many weeks, but when we get together, we pick right back up where we left off.

 

Below is my feeble attempt at gardening. I bought the tomato plant that was the largest and already had a tomato on it....lol.  My flowers really show off sometime and wither hideously other times. But I don't give up...every year I make space for some sunny little faces that give me immense pleasure when they decide to cooperate!

 

My point in this diatribe is that I really cherish my family, friends (both old and new)  and surroundings. I am satisfied..(if I had a workroom and a dining room, I'd be 100% satisfied). I don't love "things" like I used to. Instead, I love people and places that give me fond memories. I would rather somebody else be pleased or delighted than experience those feelings myself. No, I am trying to send out a "humble pie" vibe. It's just the plain truth.

I don't have to have a showroom house, inside or out. I used to think I did but not anymore. I consciously choose a home with integrity...furnishings with comfort...objects that have sweet memories and people with character and loyalty over showroom any day!

Blessings to each of you,

Angela

A Renewal of Hope

After living in the hot, humid South for over six decades, I have decided my preference (in order) for the four  seasons:
#4...SUMMER (too hot, too much daylight, too much humidity, and did I mention, Too HOT?)

#3...WINTER (I used to LOVE winter until my joints made it perfectly clear that they did NOT.
However, I do love the starkness of the landscape and the flash of red as the Cardinals feed at the bird feeders. We even had snow this year, which made for a gorgeous Spring. And fires in the fireplace....nothing better!)

#2...SPRING (I will discuss below.)

#1...AUTUMN (The colors make my heart pound! As some of you know, I have NO favorite color..
I love them all. That's why it's so hard to make decorating choices for me...I am pretty easy to please..at least for a while.)

Why has Spring displaced Winter as #2 on my "Ordered Favorite Season " you ask?
I always "liked" her...but she was like the "boy next door"...I never really and truly saw her. She was always there, quiet and delicate, but she didn't knock my socks off. Once I noticed, I fell in love.

There's something particularly endearing about the fragility of Spring. Those first few weeks when that lovely light green fluff begins to emerge from the cold, wet earth. The one little sprout, then another and then a glorious bud. The sunlight filtering through the newly budded leaves on the trees is something to behold. Spring is the season of hope renewed.

No words can adequately describe the beauty of God's creation. He provided just what we fickle humans needed...He knew that we couldn't stand the color riot of Autumn year 'round. Why we'd certainly begin to ignore all that flashy color. He was keenly aware that we would be depressed and lifeless if all our days were spent in the cold. Short on daylight we would be short on thanksgiving. Summer, the eternal vacation days of youth, would only be wasted on the young.

Now, Spring is vying for first place with Autumn in my heart. After losing both my parents, I have come to the realization that my seasons here on earth are also numbered. That reality is slowly sinking in. Oh, I've heard the new "mantra"... 50 is the new 30. So 60 must be the new 40. The problem with that way of thinking is that it gives the illusion that we will never age. We will be forever young in mind and body. And that's just not true. You can Botox and Lifestyle Lift  all day long, but the reality is every day that passes pushes you closer to your eternal destiny.

How sad that it has taken me this long to learn life's lesson. We aren't guaranteed another "season". We must seize the day. What a life we would live if we used our allotted minutes to do that which we were placed here to do! Each of us has a particular purpose given to us by the Creator. How wonderful it would be if we didn't rail against our "lot" in life and if we just determined that purpose and set our eyes on "the prize" and pushed forward toward accomplishing His desire for us.

Jesus did that. That is what Easter is all about.

 Jesus accomplished the purpose set forth by the Father.
He came as a man, He lived, died and rose again. He did His Father's will. And He did it for us. Without His determination to do His Father's will, we would have no hope...no promise of Spring.
Think on these things...time's a'tickin'.

Blessings on this Easter day,

One Aspect of Womanhood

Women are "anticipatory" creatures by nature.

I don't know if that's a real word or not.

Sometimes I make up words to express myself...

that's my point here...

Men see things or people as they are.

Women see things or people as they can become.

Men check things off their to-do list.

When finished, they watch t.v.

A woman's to-do list is never done.

There is always something or someone that needs cleaning,

straightening, "fixing"...

Women anticipate...

they can walk in a room and in 30 seconds

figure out how to "be of help",

how to "speed things up",

how to "make things prettier".

I once had an employer who called me a butterfly.

At any social event, he said I was always fluttering around.

My response was (and still is)...

"That's what women do...they flutter...they see a need

and try to make it better."

It's not all we do, but it's what we do best.

Sometimes our "anticipatory" mode gets us in trouble.

We tend to worry a LOT.

Now I know that it's not a good thing to worry,

but we do.

We know an oncoming train wreck when we see it coming,

and we want our loved ones to avoid it at all costs.

(By the way, men see it as a light at the end of the tunnel.)

Regardless of your lot in life,

99.9% of women are great at spotting needs

 and doing their best to fulfill them.

We women are complex creatures.

But where in the world would the world be without us?



Angela

Do You Dance for the Right Audience?

I am still trying to "wrap my head around" (trite, overused phrase) the fact that this week marks the end of a 31 year career. I've been whining about this for a while. Everyone who knows me well, knows that I WANT this, yet, it's disconcerting. Maybe because all is not right with my little world or maybe it's normal to feel this way or maybe it's because change is indeed, difficult.

I am re-reading a book by Jean Fleming, Between Walden and the Whirlwind. It was a gift from former assistant pastor and longtime friend, Steve Hill. I first read it during an especially difficult whirlwind time in my family's life. It's interesting to see the items I highlighted in pink. They are just as needed now as they were then.

Fleming's premise is that while we spend many of our days trying to organize and simplify, what we really need  to do is FOCUS. And by FOCUS, I don't mean focusing on ourself or our many activities, but rather we should focus on our Audience. Audience meaning our Director....God.

She gives a wonderful example of while a ballet company dances for an audience, they actually dance for their director...their true audience. Because he was the one whom they loved, feared and wanted to please even more than the public audience. Should we do less before God?

I have spent the greater part of my almost 63 years trying to please others. And I found out a secret that I wish to impart to you. Pssttt....It hasn't worked!!! People are fickle. They are working out their own agenda...and surprise (!), it is usually focused on themselves...NOT YOU! No matter how hard you dance, they want a different step, new music, better lightling and costumes....Folks, we are dancing for the wrong audience.

Ecclesiastes 12:8-"Meaningless! Meaningless!" says the Teacher. "Everything is meaningless!" NIV (or if you like King James, "Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher; all is vanity.") Now, I know this type language is a real turn off to some, but this quote was quite a blockbuster to me (I knew it but I didn't practice it.) "When we determine our audience, we determine our reward. If we play our life to men, we receive the kinds of rewards men give; if we focus on pleasing our Father in Heaven we receive the kinds of rewards God gives," says Fleming.

Here on this earth, all these years,  I have been given all sorts of chances. Now I've been given one of retiring from the work I considered "important" all this time. All of a sudden a thought formed in my mind. I had always wanted to have a little shop, sell my art and such...but is that what God has in mind for me? Maybe so, maybe not. The constant advertising, showing my stuff online, talking about how to do things...it's exhausting. Why? I think I know...it's been done for an audience....a wide audience. BUT IS IT THE RIGHT AUDIENCE?

Heaven knows I understand the rewards of good advertising...look at Coke and McDonald's but, have I focused the advertising of my "art" on pleasing man for a buck or on God for the good I could do...should do? (I need an extra income...retirement for teachers who don't have all their years invested in the public schools is NOT lucrative.) But I think my focus has been skewed.

As I walk (limp) on my journey (as to what God has intended for me), I will share what I learn but for a different reason...Fleming says, "Decisive living requires the selective burning of bridges." "To live with firm direction requires deliberate choices." I will practice focusing on THE Director and how He wants me to dance, until it becomes a way of life, even at this stage in my living and on the stage HE has provided.

Until later,

 

I Was Never Good At Treading Water

Did you think I'd died? I haven't.
Did you think I'd moved away? Nope.
Did you think, "Something's happened?" It has.

Remember how I always put the Emily Dickinson quote, "Dwell in possibility" in all my headers? Well, I quit dwelling and launched. Launched a new business, Dwellings, (but kept teaching), launched a new Etsy Shop (amcinnisartworks), tried to keep being a decent wife, grandmother and friend (have done my best), and tried to live with knee pain 24/7 (not doing so well here).

Lots of water has flowed under the bridge since I last posted. I must confess that it's been a lot like trying to keep my head above water through a tidal wave. I've overloaded and it's showing up in all sorts of disagreeable ways.

People kept urging me to post a blog...they wanted to see what I was doing and read something funny...but honestly, nothing has been too mirthful these past 5 months and the little things I'm trying to do haven't been especially great.

This week is Spring Break and the dogwoods are in full bloom. All the normal spring flowers jumped the gun and bloomed two weeks or so ago. And I am sitting here treading water, trying to get my life back into some semblance of order. I need some "art" time. I need some rest. And I need encouragement. Trying to make my mind up if "dwelling" is indeed better than actually "launching".

See you soon,

T'was the Day After Christmas...Life's Lessons

T'was the night after Christmas and the holidays have been officially "put to bed" at our house. I have a confession to make...(don't tell anyone)...I wasn't in the holiday spirit this year. Oh, I tried, but the new shop made it super difficult.

When offered the opportunity to rent a building, buy the previous owner out and open "Dwellings Refined", I jumped at the chance. I have always wanted to have my own shop, but I wanted it on my own terms and in my own time. I have found out something extremely important...you NEVER get anything in YOUR time and totally on your OWN terms.

Why did it take me 62 years to figure that one out? Life is about choices, opportunities, failures and victories. You never quit learning, no matter how old you are. Once a upon a time, I thought I knew it all...I was 16. By 28, I KNEW I knew it all. By 45, it began to dawn on me that there might be others who really did know more than I knew. By 60, I decided I didn't know even 1/4 as much as I once thought I knew.
Next year (2012) will usher in my 63rd year on this earth...boy, have I got a lot to learn!
# ONE on the list is to listen more, talk less and to not sweat the small things. :)

Happy week after Christmas,
Angela

See our Dwellings items here!

Bloom Where You Are Planted

"To succeed-do the best you can,
where you are,
with what you have."

"Always do your best. What you plant now,
you will harvest later".
Og Mandino

"It's not true that nice guys finish last.
Nice guys are winners before the game even starts."

"A child educated only at school is an uneducated child."
George Santayana

"A genuine sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to our steps
as we walk the tightrope of life."

"Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently."
Henry Ford

"Be kind; everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
John Watson

"Every job is a portrait of the person who did it."

"We learn as much from sorrow as from joy,
as much from illness as from health,
from handicap as from advantage-
and indeed perhaps more."
Pearl S. Buck

Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life,

Give Me Your Forlorn, Your Raggedy...The Encouragement Factor

Before I go on my rant about encouraging others, look at my weekend Flea Market finds!
I rather dread the polishing process, but I know this silver bowl/compote will be lovely!

The white wrought iron plant stand will go on the porch beside the white rocker...can't wait to put a pretty pink geranium in it! The old drink box is the real reason I went to the FM in the first place. CanNOT wait to show you what I'm doing with it...hint: it's getting close to "chicken" time!
More "wabbits"...

Yellow daisy ...

Pink daisy...


White daisy...

Blue hydrangea...

Tiny daffodils....

Something for the boys...Little Bunny Blue
Now, on to the subject at hand!!

There is something very satisfying in rescuing the forlorn, the could-be's in this world...excuse me, I sound like the Statue of Liberty, don't I? However, I have always had a special place in my heart for taking the raggedy and making it, well, lovely.

Once, in high school Home Ec. III class, my mother let me re-purpose a large storage closet off our kitchen and turn it into a pantry/laundry room for my assigned "home project". I painted it sunshine yellow (more stop signish yellow..ugh) and made black and white flowered curtains for the windows. Remember: this was in the heyday of Flower Children. I worked like a trojan on the room and in the end was delighted with the result. (Nobody in my family, except Mother, was as delighted.) I pressed on.
To this day, few people in my family get fired up about my "nonsense" except possibly my Granddaughter.( I believe I see a spark of artsy in her...I can only hope and encourage.) Does their lack of "loving what I do" discourage me? Strangely, no. It used to disappoint me greatly. I'm saddened that people don't see certain aspects of the world like I do, but it's ok...I choose to continue to press forward. (Excuse the dramatics.)

The re-purpose (aka: helping others) factor is what I love so much about blogging. There are so many creative women out there who daily tackle projects that nobody even thinks about, much less does! This spirit is very important to families...it needs to be passed on to a generation that is on the fast track to little if any exposure to "the good ole American spirit" of Can Do plus WILL Do.

(Check out http://www.incourage.me/)

There is something satisfying in not only knowing you CAN be helpful but in actually putting your shoulder next to someone who is struggling and "pushing" along with them.

When asked "Why do you do such and such?"

My answer is twofold:

1. Because I CAN;

2. Because I WANT to.

Folks, it's not just about re-painting and re-purposing furniture or making a Spring basket!

To me, it's infinitely more satisfying to see a "student" excel than to "top out" myself. One day, I'll be a memory, but a little of me will continue on if that student chooses to pass on "the help & encouragement factor". You can never underestimate the far reaching arms of the encouragement factor.

Now, let's go forth and encourage!