I am sitting here wondering, if somebody, say me, is not in a great mood and doesn't feel too cheerful and would rather not write, should I do what I encourage others to do (which is "chin up") or should I just fluff out tonight and do nothing? Pastor Shelton used to say, "Your walk talks; your talk talks; but your walk talks louder than your talk talks." Ok, I'll write...but it won't be funny. Tomorrow I'll brighten up, I promise.
I have had a disappointment...should be used to those by now, but ever the eternal optimist...I really do try to see the glass half full...today for some reason, I can't move past "the half empty" level in my life. I am trying to see the best in a situation that is so cloudy that I can't read the road signs. Have you ever been at those crossroads? I am tired and worn down and can't see the forest for the trees.
I understand that life is like a tapestry and it won't be complete until the Lord weaves the final threads, but my question is how do you continue facing turmoil and strife and stand strong until this experience called life is truly complete? Don't be weary in well doing, you say? I know that one, too and I love the verse. All things work together for good to those who love the Lord, you press onward. But today I just feel like my engine has slap run out of gas.
It's days like today that I remember Miss Shields, a dear woman of God who attended my church until the day she died. Years ago when I ran into a brick wall similar to today's, I went to her to seek wisdom. I asked her, " How do you go on? How do you face another disappointment, another heartache, another setback? How do you have the strength to try once more?" Her answer surprised me. She looked at me and said, "When you get to that point, you have to realize that God is enough." What?! At the time, I thought I needed something more than that statement...and now, I find myself standing in the same place again...asking the same question and the same answer comes to mind. "Angela, God is enough." He is bigger than your problems, He's mightier than your foes, He cares more about you and your family than anyone on this earth. He is TRULY enough.
Today I have expressed my disappointment in a not so nice tone. I probably haven't been the best testimony. (You can scratch out the word "probably" in the above sentence.)
I remember a great story about a man walking down the road with a huge heavy pack on his back...a kind man in a wagon stopped and said, "Let me give you a ride, friend." The burdened man gratefully jumped into the wagon and sat in the seat by the driver, but he kept his huge pack on his back. The kind driver said, "Man, throw that burden behind you in the wagon!" The rider replied, "Oh, you were so nice to give me a ride, that I couldn't ask you to carry my pack, too!" That is exactly what I am doing today. I am riding with Jesus and still hanging onto the burden...and that burden must be tossed to the back of the wagon. Christ can handle the weight, I can't. I am weak, He is strong.
I knew the answer to my question before I asked it. I want to make sure you know the answer, too. God IS enough...for me and for you. Brighter tomorrows always follow dark todays. Thank you for listening.